Hello!
It feels good to post again. It has been way too long. Thanksgiving, Leslie's birthday as well as end of the semester school projects and activities have kept me busy.
I have actually been dreading the Christmas season a little bit this time around. I was diagnosed last year a few weeks after Christmas. The onset of the cold weather has reminded me of the last time I felt cold when I was in the midst of all my chemo trips. I know it is silly really but it makes it hard to get in the "Christmas spirit."
As we were putting up the tree last weekend it struck me how differently I view the world now than I did last Christmas. It seems like I was somewhat naive back then, plugging through the holidays with blinders on while the whole time I knew I had a big lump under my arm. Never once at that time did it ever even cross my mind that it was cancer. I knew cancer could happen to me. I knew bad things could happen, but I was just too busy to even stop and think about it. I am certainly not that way now. Every odd or unexpected pain now makes me wonder. It never did before. And so it has been hard lately to feel much Christmas cheer.
All of that changed today though when we experienced our first snowfall. It wasn't a particularly large snowfall, maybe and inch or two, but the snow was perfect for lots of family fun. We were all out this morning building a snowman. It was the coolest one ever I might add thanks to perfect conditions and a snowman kit (which was a Christmas present from my sister's family three years ago) that we were finally able to use to its fullest. The snowman had two faces, one in the front that we could see from our house window and one in the back close to the road for cars driving by to see. We had so much fun. When we finally came inside for some hot cholocate Leslie said, "This is going to be the best Christmas ever." And she is so right. As usual I was letting myself dwell on my cancer past and all the negative aspects of the season...all the hustle, bustle and work. But this morning I got a reminder of just how lucky I am. I get to experience it all...writing out all those Christmas cards, the packed shopping malls, the wrapping, the baking, the feasting and most especially celebrating the birth of our blessed Lord and Savior. I am constantly amazed at how my kids help me put things into perspective sometimes. So come Christmas! Come! Merry Christmas everyone! Lots of love,
Kerry
I make a snowman every year (I'm in my 60s). Last year's snowman was made a month before my diagnosis for ovarian. I'm post-chemo, have curlylocks atop my head, and I'll be making a snowman again this year. I set aside old glasses frames, mittens, scarves during the year so when the snow is ready, I'm ready. Merry Christmas to you and your family. God bless you all!
ReplyDeleteKerry! I can't believe you made such a huge snowman on 2 inches of snow! I am not that talented at all. I wish you the VERY BEST Christmas ever.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Amy
Here's an analogy for you, Kerry. We dealt with quite a bump in the road over the last year. We crested that hill, and now we are on our sleds and headed down. Enjoy the slide! If there is another hill, well, we'll just grab our sleds and climb that hill one step at a time, anticipating the ride down the other side.
ReplyDeleteHey Kerry, So far the computer hasnt crashed! Love your snowmen!!! We all do have so much to be thankful for this Christmas and every Christmas. May God continue to bless you and your family. Merry Christmas!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteLove and God Bless
Renee
Kerry,
ReplyDeleteIt is a year for reflection, isn't it? Sometimes I wish all of us, but especially you, could go back to life before breast cancer. I wish the little pains didn't worry you.
As I reflect, I am very thankful. I wish the cancer hadn't come into your life, Kerry, and would change it if I could. I am thankful you went through the treatments and they were successful. I am thankful for our famiy and the assurance of the future I see in our children. I am thankful for our faith that pulled us through the darkest days, and for all the people who showed us such kindness.
I am especially thankful to have you with us at Christmas, Kerry.
Take care of yourself and remember how much we all love you.
Mitzi