Finding Normal

I had the best sleep last night that I have had in two weeks. Today we are trying to get our family back to "normal." The last few days Laura has had her face plastered to her Nintendo DS and it was worrying me. I believe it had become her coping mechanism. Yesterday afternoon she actually played outside. Today she is complaining about what I've picked out for her to wear and she and Leslie are bickering. For once it is actually music to my ears.

Randy and I are beginning to be a little nervous about the chemo port surgery on Tuesday next week. The lymph nodes have gotten so big they are pressing on one of my nerves and I cannot feel the back of my arm.

Randy read last week in one of the cancer books that emotion during a hardship is like a wave and I have definately found that to be true. One minute I could smile. The next I was shaking or crying uncontrollably. My sister Mitzi passed on some advice to me from a dear friend of hers who has battled brain cancer. It is a list of stages you will go through each day when coping with a hardship. These helped me a great deal last week. I know I will be referring to this list alot next year and I wanted to share it. Here it is. Every day:
1. Be thankful for what you have
2. Grieve for what you have lost
3. Do practical things
4. Find your new "normal"

I feel like today my family is embarking on our journey to "find our new normal." Every night now before bed Randy and I are holding hands and praying together, something we did not do before. I can see that in spite of all this, we are stronger and being blessed as a family. Please continue to pray for us. Lots of love,
Kerry